Husband Hunting: How things have changed
I’ve had about four people send me an article from a 1950’s magazine. The title is “129 ways to get a husband.” Those who sent it all mentioned that Aunt Bossy would surely have something to say about it. Oh, yes, I do.
Firstly, while much of it is horrifying (taking out a billboard with your picture and phone number or pretending to drown at a beach where there are lots of men) a lot of it makes more sense than searching through Match.com or Tinder or attending AA meetings in hope of finding a partner.
The article is too long to be accommodated in my column, but I’ve got the link below.
A few comments: “Get a dog and walk it.” This is a pretty good idea, but is actually a better way for men to meet women than for women to meet men. My husband always insisted that dogs were “babe magnets.” He certainly met every woman in town while he was walking Frankie.
“Go to Yale.” Hillary met Bill at Yale, so you may want to rethink that one.
“Stand in a corner and cry.” If I see this, I will give you something to cry about. Really. Do you really want to meet a guy who likes victims?
“Be nice to everyone. They may have an eligible friend or son.” I just gave this advice to my clients the other day when I was talking about how to build business. Besides, it is the right thing to do.
“Go out with Ugly men, Handsome is as handsome does.” Ugly is in the eye of the beholder, but I get the concept.
My three favorites: “Learn to paint. Set up an easel outside an engineering school.” “Get a job selling fishing lures.” “Stand on a street corner with a lasso.”
The article did lose me at “Wear high heels.” Being a silly girl is one thing. Torturing yourself is another.
Bottom line: As bizarre as some of these suggestions are, they are benign compared to filling your body with silicone, focusing on how you look to the detriment of anything else, and dressing like a hooker to get attention and then complaining about being harassed.
You will get a kick out of this article if you have a sense of humor and don‘t allow yourself to be drawn into a furor about the way things used to be. (“Hide your phi beta kappa key??”) Fortunately, we women have proven that we are capable of taking care of ourselves, being intelligent, adventurous, and at the same time, appreciative of a fine man.
Oh, and have fun and be happy. Good humans are drawn to that, and you certainly don’t want to be stuck with someone who isn’t, no matter how much you want companionship. And, of course, the best advice is to learn to like being alone, and know that running into someone with whom you’d like to share your life is a bonus and not a necessity.
P.S. I did have a friend who used to spend her lunch hours riding in elevators in buildings where the kind of men she liked worked. She met her husband on the Long Island railroad.