Dear FASHIONGRANNY,

fashion-grannyI am in my 60s, and my sister told me I am too old to wear jeans. Her fanny has “left the building” but mine has not. Your thoughts?

-Vintage Chick

 

Dear Vintage Chick,

Great question and Yes! I definitely have thoughts!

Isn’t it nice to have a tight tush? FASHIONGRANNY has been blessed in that department as well, for all the good it does her!

Do you think you’re too old to wear jeans? For me, your body style and how the jeans are cut usurp the question of age appropriateness.

I have seen, as I am sure you have, some real disasters with our fashion sisters and  brothers when their jeans don‘t fit right or their body style is sabotaged by a trendy cut.

It is wrong! Terribly wrong!

Whether or not you have a cute fanny weighs in far less than “do they fit?” Do you have plumbers butt when you sit down?

I learned along the way, from years of family photos, more about what styles not to wear as opposed to the styles that flatter. Photos really do tell the story, not to mention mirrors. Mirrors are our friends! Unless of course you are delusional, and then everything looks great on you.

If you are a vintage chick wearing ribbons, zippers, and bows on your jeans, that would be age inappropriate, and I’d agree with Sis! With that caveat, let me include 80-year-old men and women who, unless they look like Esther Williams and Johnny Weissmuller (kids go to Wikipedia), should remove all fashion denim from their closets, period. Sorry.

Vintage Chick, you have FASHIONGRANNY doing some deep thinking. Ouch!

Why do I wear jeans? The origin of jeans is not very glamorous!

Why did they become fashion? Truly, unless you were a farmer, laborer, steel mill worker, cowboy or prisoner at Sing Sing, the need to wear a stiff, scratchy, heavy-duty denim fabric on your person is plain fashion crazy! Maybe that is the answer.

I remember when fashion jeans first appeared on the scene; I went right out and bought my obligatory Cher two-piece vest / pant denim set! Ahh, the Good Old Days!!

My last thought is that, now, after reading my column, I am going to the closet to try on all my many denim anythings, ‘cause I just might be a little long in the tooth for some of my jean wardrobe and maybe my fanny ain’t all that!

Yes! I am going to take my own advice; I am going to directly to the mirror and get honest in my own delusional way!

 

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