Ignorance is bliss. I don’t think so! We’ve all heard this saying. Many of us hold it as an axiom, or have, at least, believed it. I mean, I would ask: How ignorant is it to find bliss in groping around in the dark? Won’t be too long before you blow that toe out on the dresser, will it?
I submit that ignorance can be an asset, however. Maybe it’s more accurate to call it innocence. Scar tissue has its downside. In other words, not knowing that you cannot or should not do something can be a good thing, beyond beginner’s luck.
It was a simpler time—the age of innocence. Do you think we notice those halcyon days as they’re occurring, or are we always longing for the good ole days? I need to give credit to myself here for recognizing certain good ole days as they were occurring. My college years and early Mr. Mom days with my daughter, for example. If I allow myself, regarding my time at the University of South Carolina, I’d focus on all the fun and forget the sometimes-painful immaturity I had, as a young adult, to handle college until around my senior year. But, in general, the desire for innocence never dulls or deflates, as we progress through life’s gauntlet. We yearn for the predictability that predictably ended “unpredictably.” I can only strive daily to be where my feet are.
Speaking of innocence: I can’t recall any adult, of significance, in my family of origin, not talking about what a cruel, harsh land, “adult-land” is. Were they well-meaning? Yes, I think so. We’re talking about members of the “Greatest Generation” and their children. People that survived the Great Depression, WWII, the Cold War, the turbulent 60’s, etc. The real question was and is: Was it necessary to paint such a bleak perspective? In this moment, I’m reflecting on the alternate reality, that exists on another plane, of what life may have been like had I been allowed to keep my rose-colored glasses. Things looked so pretty through those prisms and lenses. I’m just now considering such things as I approach my 50th.
Care must be taken not to conflate the empty-calories of nostalgia with the protein shake of a reality check. Reality: There was still tragedy during the good times. Ye olde birth, death, rebirth… This is no different from remembering a crossed-over loved one as a saint rather than the human they actually were. Time beatifies in this manner.
So, let’s focus on what you’re doing best today, even if it’s just having a good cry. Some people cannot. or will not emote in that manner. Be careful of jumping on that grenade, btw. There are things that are going right, even when everything else is going wonky. What’s important is that you’re honest here. Everyone wants to know dirty laundry—the soiled souls, but not everyone wants to process said laundry.
It’s time to do what you don’t want to do, or don’t feel comfortable doing, so you can get what you want. In a similar vein, consider that it’s not who you know, but who knows you. Your reputation precedes you.
Is it true that life doesn’t give you more than you can handle? Maybe. I’ve believed and espoused this notion in the past. It does have some merit, but there is a hint of dismissive aftertaste here. Maybe life gives you what it gives you and you decide whether or not to step up.
Meliorism is the belief that we can contribute to positive change and improve the world through acts of love, creativity, compassion, and kindness. I like the sound of that ism word—the innocence of it all. It’s time we consider what is really blasphemy, and what only sounds blasphemous because we were told it was blasphemous. Or even because of who uttered such treason against the souls of us all.
So, ask yourself: When was the last time you looked to the sky in hope— hope of a better evening, hope of a better relationships to whoever or whatever, hope of a better life? “Hopefulness is adversarial. It is the warrior emotion.” (Nick Cave) When you kill, or attempt to murder a person’s hope, you’re robbing the cradle, so to speak.
Your destiny could be written in the clouds. Breathe in for a few beats as your gaze lifts to the heavens. Hold. Now exhale as your point of view descends back down to the Earth. Annnd breathe….
