Dear Readers,
Now, it seems the best we can generally hope for is civility and reasonably good manners. The bottom line is making people feel good in almost any situation. You know not to ever tell someone that their behind looks enormous in that bathing suit, when they ask. Fibbing is not only allowable in etiquette, it is required. You, hopefully, won’t say, “Bertha, your butt looks like the back of a Greyhound bus, I hope you won’t be mistaken for a whale at the beach.” Instead, “Darling, your delicious full figure is quite womanly and will allow us not to have to take an extra cushion upon which to sit on the bleachers.” See how easy it is? Look at it as a means to be creative. You may even be self-deprecating, if it will suit the purpose.
Henry asked me what he can do when he is at work and people come to his counter and are talking on their cell phones while making their requests. Someone suggested that he just to ignore them until they’re finished with their call. That works, but may back up the line. “Please step aside until you are ready to give me your full attention,” is a thought, but not much fun. If you have to “educate” people in how to treat you respectfully, you might as well either enjoy it, or make a game of it, until you find a solution. Let’s all get together, write in, and give Henry some suggestions. I’m all for: “I’m deaf and can only read lips, so if you want to discuss sex on a first date instead of the bottle of aspirin that I’m selling, I suggest you get off the phone.” Or: “I have anger management issues and if you continue to talk on the phone at my counter I’m going to start shouting obscenities at you because you are really annoying me.” Or he could give them a box of Depends instead of that aspirin, smile sweetly when they object, and say, “Sorry, I couldn’t understand you while you were talking to someone else.” Come on readers, join in the game – let’s have fun with this and help Henry.
L. A. Plume