Author: Laura Packard

I am here to tell you I survived, but just barely, one of America’s most treasured innovations; the good old-fashioned yard sale.

Alright, fellas. Listen up.          I am about to use a word that is 99% assured to make you giggle, stand up straight and then all of sudden start paying attention.

(Six Acts, both comedic and tragic)

In the name of the well-deserved and rightfully retired Captain Stubing, say it isn’t so, y’all.          It appears it could be time to whip out your 50 lb boom box, unpack your rolled up posters of the “Brat Pack” and peel on those shin tight, acid-washed jeans. Another dreaded 80’s trend has risen, like a crazy-eyed extra from the Thriller video, from the dead.

For Charlie: As Jerry Garcia would say, “our strong suit is doing what we do.”  May 11th will be 20 years strong. My husband doesn’t wear his wedding ring.          It bothers him while playing golf, showering, shaving, eating and simply breathing.

Insects suck.             Both literally and figuratively. And I have the physical and mental (the one and only time I went camping) scars to prove it.

I’m perplexed.             I plug a phone charger into the electrical outlet, attached to my phone,  leave the room for a sec… and poof!

My girls are giddy, y’all.          The temperatures have reached a steady warmth and, despite the pollen dusted sidewalks and porch swings, we’ve finally felt safe enough to put up those bulky winter sweaters and pull out our pretty, flowy and fresh outfits for spring.

What happens in the dog park stays in the dog park. So the saying goes.    Not so much in my neighborhood. Here, dogs are akin to the precious cows that roam the streets of India. Only ours are on retractable leashes wearing trendy T-shirts and bright spring-colored Ralph Lauren raincoats as soon as it starts to drizzle.

I hate cleaning.             My friend Alicia finds it therapeutic; the sweet swish of the dishwasher, the sturdy turn of the dryer, the glitter of a freshly scrubbed sink. These are the sounds and sights of accomplishment.