When my daughter sent me my grandson’s first-grade report card, I expected the usual rundown of grades and academic milestones. Instead, I got a masterclass in humility, parenting wisdom, and a window into the mind of the coolest little seven-year-old.
As I scanned the report, my eyes stopped at the teacher’s character assessment: “kind and flexible.” My first thought? Wow, I must have done something right to raise a daughter who’s raised a child like this. But, no—that’s not quite right. She’s the amazing one. If I were a fairy godmother, dispensing magical gifts, kindness and flexibility would be right at the top of my list. Move over, math skills and reading comprehension—my grandson’s got traits that are even more valuable.
Kindness: A Rare and Precious Gift
Kindness feels so rare these days, doesn’t it? Think about how many times we’re given the choice to be kind rather than “right.” Or consider those impressive, high-achieving people who somehow lack warmth and connection. Peruse social media during an election season. My grandson’s kindness reminds me that something as simple as a kind word, a warm hug, or even eye contact with a stranger is a superpower. It’s a superpower with unlimited potential—one that will serve him as well as any future all A report card.
Flexibility: The Superpower I Wish I Had
Then there’s flexibility—or as I like to call it, “bouncebackability.” It’s that rare trait that will carry him further than his love for numbers or his ability to write words with blends. Flexibility is like having a built-in trampoline for life’s curveballs. When I think of all the times I’ve wished I could bend a little, push the boundaries, or take the leap, I’m reminded of how hard that actually is. Widening the circle, climbing the cliff, taking a chance: all these things are a struggle for me.
“But you’re good at rewriting the story,” my friend likes to remind me. Fair enough. I’ve been knocked down enough times to know that almost any hardship can be turned into a lesson—or at the very least, a funny story with a twist ending. The alternative? Staying mired in life’s inevitable mud puddles, or worse, letting things that happen to me become who I am. So yes, I’m semi-good at changing my attitude. But if my grandson is already flexible enough to transition between activities smoother than a Slip ’N Slide, that’s a huge life advantage.
The Reality Check
Just as I was basking in the glow of this parenting win-by-proxy, life served up a reality sandwich. Mid-conversation, my daughter got a text: her younger son had been put in toddler time-out for running wild in the halls and using “potty words.” Whoops! Just when you think you’re nailing this grandparenting gig, life reminds you it has a wicked sense of humor.
The Evolution of Parenting Wisdom
I do give parenting advice from time to time, although carefully and with restraint. Things have changed a lot in three decades. You can’t let babies sleep on their stomachs anymore, or with a pillow, a blanket, or—God forbid—a stuffed animal. Installing car seats now requires an engineering degree, and “gentle parenting” sounds like a foreign language that, if I’m honest, might actually be better.
But there’s one piece of advice I always give, which I completely ignored when reading that report card: Don’t take credit for your children’s successes or blame for their transgressions. It’s just easier that way. Yet here I was, ready to accept a “World’s Best Grandma” trophy for traits my grandson developed largely without my input.
Perhaps the real lesson here is that flexibility isn’t just for the young—we grandparents could use a dose of it, too. So, here’s to kindness, flexibility, and the humbling journey of watching the next generation grow. May we all be blessed with the wisdom to recognize these gifts, the humility to nurture them without taking credit, and the flexibility to laugh when life reminds us that we’re still learning, too.
