Sutty NewHeadshotSome of us have hidden abilities and now it’s time to claim a fundamental one as your own. Even at a level we want to call mastery, when fundamentals fall by the wayside due to complacency, we have further to go in our so-called mastery. I’ll start off by saying, “To Hell with New Year’s resolutions.”

That’s right, I’m sparing you the “new year, new you” bulls*** that sets us up for failure in most cases along with feelings of inadequacy. Besides, I’d prefer not to be drowned out in the crowd of mostly well-meaning people.

            Is developing the ability of unpredictability a sure fire way of success? I would say, “not in and of itself.” “What’s the point?” is your next justifiable question. The point is perspective and how it never hurts to at least see how the other half lives before judging it. 

            What are some basics we can do to achieve this little known and overlooked super power? How about starting with a “Do NOT Do” list rather than a “To-Do” list and see how that frees you up? I often say and feel how liberating it is to know pitfalls to avoid and then use intuition to fill in the blanks of what to do. That behavior allows you to make what I’ll call “an original decision.” A decision made from one’s own heart rather than a check list.

            Further, you can decide to cease being the damsel in distress. Decide to cease being the knight to end all nightmares. Decide to halt the cliché. Be wild and don’t let the outcome of sports dictate your mood. (I’m talking to myself here too.) It’s supposed to be fun, remember? Okay, time to forgive Team USA’s debacle at the Ryder Cup for being a bigger disappointment than Jim Harbaugh at Michigan despite everything Urban Meyer can do to make him look good.

            If you’re always on the go, stop. If you’re never on the go, start. Either way, what are you scared of? But nothing! Let’s be clear, I’m talking about being busy and seeking more when you happen upon a spare moment. This is what’s called being in the business of being busy. What does that get you? Believe or not, it likely gets you about the same as not doing anything. You just don’t give yourself time to think about matters of the heart, whereas too much time = quagmire. 

            If you always initiate, then don’t. If you don’t, then do. At the very least, it’ll be mighty revealing of the power struggles within as well as power struggles with others. Remember to pay attention to your internals via meditation.

            How about not posting to social media? In a world where you may be starved for attention, how about attending to yourself one day, then keeping it to yourself or just one trusted loved one in a moment of shared intimacy? That’s just one day where you don’t give in to your neediness. I can tell you from experience that a needy person, even if attractive by outward appearances and abilities, is a huge turn-off to those of us interested in the great frontier within.

            If you’re a narcissistic, acerbic, and/or cynical meanie, then be nice for a change. It will confuse the dickens out of somebody. It you get off on said confusion, see a shrink or even an energy worker. Either way, you’ll get a reflection back from somebody that can’t be manipulated by your “sorcerer’s ways,” thus providing a path for growth. If you are too nice, then stand up for yourself. Remember narcs seek out people-pleasers, but you have a choice whether or not you feed the energy vampires. BE UNPREDICTABLE!

            If you consider yourself a liberated woman who clutches her pearls at the sight of a toilet lid up, how about being grateful? Yes grateful. You have hands and eyes to let you know it’s up and the ability to put it down, as well as the ability to go to the bathroom unaided. (Some people don’t have that.) If you think you’re a caring, considerate man, but roll your eyes and belittle her every time your girl gets “emotional”, try listening for once. It’ll blow her mind and could do wonders for a sputtering relationship. Don Draper makes for good TV, not real life. 


Chris (Sutty) Suddeth was born in Greenville, SC in 1975 and has lived his whole life in various locales within the state of South Carolina. He graduated from the University of South Carolina in 1998 with a minor in English Literature. Writing began its siren song for him at the age of twelve while he was sitting on the rocks of Fripp Island, SC, where he now lives with his wife and daughter. Sutty is a full-time Mr. Mom with his own holistic health business. Sutty has been a practicing Reiki Master and emotional energetic alchemist since 2010. Sutty just welcomed his debut novel Swoondalini into the world. It’s available at Amazon. Visit www.soulshinerefinery.com for more information.